Being Seen

"Hansy"

Custom Pet Portrait in Progress

Oil on Canvas

Never before did I appreciate art's ability to make me feel "seen". These days I am in contact with more people than ever before in my life. I am physically noticed by others hundreds of times a day, due to my day job. People like me. They feel helped and heard by me. This feels good. However, on the flip side, I feel completely invisible. At first this had a delicious quality to it. It was like performing on stage or playing dress up. There was no pressure or expectation. However, now it feels like my costume has become my uniform. A new identity is emerging and I just feel lost.

As I work on "Hansy" I become intimate with my old identity for brief periods. It is glorious and soul wrenching all at once. Now for those of you who follow Zen beliefs that warn against having an attachment to a surface identity, I know this is what I've been doing. I've preached against this in the past but obviously am not listening to my own sermon. My awareness keeps me from completely believing my own rubbish but does not kill the deep ache. Gandhi I'm not. Attachments I have. So be it.

If you've never painted I'm not sure I can tell you what it is like to watch colors blend and shapes form with a mere sweep of a brush. When all goes well it is like magic. The kind of magic I'm talking about is where you feel enough control to know you are holding the brush but you've let go enough to watch in amazement as images unfold like something greater than you was doing the work. I actually believe in those moments a higher power is involved. This to me is similar to the runner's high I used to get around mile 6 of a 7 to 10 mile run on a Saturday. It isn't a guaranteed experience but worth the effort to feel it just once an a while.

So stay tuned for the occasional high. These a fewer than ever before. Don't give up. They are still worth the wait.

The Gift of Hansy

Beginnings of 8x10 oil portrait.

It’s been a long time. I’ve heard from several readers expressing their concern over my well being. I was so surprised to find out how many people I’ve never met, regularly checked into Soulful Studios. Thank you to those who reached out. I am physically well and still giving others gray hair.

Emotionally I’ve been struggling. My life has changed yet again but this time my art couldn’t carry me through it all. At first it was an outlet but then it became frightening. Humans make connections to places, scents and tastes. Sometimes this is a good thing. Think of the smell of cotton candy. Where do you go? Other times it can have devastating results. Think of the smell of a musty basement or alcohol wipes. I was truly unaware of the associations I had made with the process of making art. Holding a brush surrounded by the aroma of oils and paints kept taking me to a place I no longer wanted to visit. Feelings would bubble to the surface that I had no desire to face. A soul can only take so much and finally I was flying the white flag. I put down my brush.

The fact of the matter is that the world really doesn’t care if you are screaming surrender. Life goes on with or without you. If you look like dead meat vultures will make a meal of you. While I watched the scavengers circle I was called to duty. A pet portrait was needed. This was no ordinary portrait but a proclamation of love. Love is something that I can never resist. So, again the brush was in my hand.

Above is the beginning of Hansel. Hansy’s “mom” was going through great loss and pain. As all good dogs do, Hansy stayed by her side to soften the grief. Dog’s can be selfless that way. They will absorb the pain of those they love. If you don’t believe this, try being with someone that has a heavy heart and walk away feeling light. It is impossible. Hansy had a noble purpose beyond also being comic relief. The man that commissioned this piece knows this and wanted to honor that and his love for Hansy’s “mom”. This is irresistible to me. The painting needed to be done.

Now I’m forced to face those feelings and find new connections. I’m pleased with the progress and thankful to be saved from myself one more time. I do believe being able to paint as I do is a gift and to let my easel collect dust is probably a sin. Creativity is not supposed to sit in the shadows. It is light and must shine or it becomes just another part of the darkness. I can’t let that happen. So until the sun shines brightly again, I’ll just keep lighting candles.

Dog Portrait - Jade

"Jade"
8x10
Graphite on archival paper

Finally I can post my recent Soulful Studios dog portrait which was commissioned as a very thoughtful anniversary gift. This is "Jade". She is another loving pooch so thankful to be rescued and brought into a caring home. Loyal to her human dad, Jade has matured to become a sweetheart that gives back every single day. Sure she may have started out as a challenging addition to the family but like so many rescues, love cured all for her.

Do you know a great dog and want to honor him or her with a portrait? Mother's Day is fast approaching and commissioning a portrait of Mom's favorite furry child is a great way to say how much you love her. The process is easy. Just go onto the contact page of my Soulful Studios main site and send me a request for information. Gather a few photos and we'll choose together the best pose and that's it. Hope to hear from you.

Plein Air Plight Or Delight

"Saturday Morning Bench Sitting"

acrylic on panel

5"x7"

With new and very tiny paint box in hand, Brady and I ventured to the little pond across the street to do some plein air work. As we stepped out the door I must admit I was ready to turn around. 29 degrees is a bit cold for me to sit in one place for very long. However, my goal today was to complete a small painting outside without adding anything to it once I returned to the studio. My guess was that the brisk air and the bone chilling breeze would just make me work that much faster. Brady and I were not to be denied.

Now I know that there are plein air painters that can withstand snow and sleet to paint. I will admit to you that though I love art, I hate the cold more. Brady and I walked around the pond and checked out the view from both sides where there were benches. Neither view was outstanding but both were peaceful. We chose the spot that provided the greatest warmth from the sun. I just refused to suffer.

Quickly we got to work. Brady found a stick to chew and another dog at which to growl. I found pleasure in the trees that framed the scene across the pond. I worked with six of my new Golden Open Acrylics and was quite pleased with how they handled. To keep to my promise to work quickly and freely I used a large brush and did not sketch anything out. No guts no glory.

To my surprise I barely felt cold. I was in the moment and it was heaven. Colors sang with the birds while light flickered over the water. This was living. Just as I realized I could no longer feel my thumb the painting was finished. At that point I unleashed my tiny brush that was reserved purely for my signature. Brady and I packed up and floated home.

As I returned to civilization I watched people walking while talking on their cell phones and barely even noticing the bright blue of the sky. I was so thankful that for the past hour or so when I was totally one with my surroundings and even created something to mark the day. How blessed am I?

If you'd like to purchase this or any other painting please visit my Soulful Studios website, go to the Contact Lori page and send me an email for information. Enjoy your weekend everyone.

Doberman Dog Portrait - Max and Maya - Update

Spring is finally here and they are calling for a little March messiness tomorrow. I've been busy working on several small pet portraits that are surprise gifts so I cannot post them yet. Those will be posted as the recipients get the chance to enjoy their pet portraits. Meanwhile I thought I would share the progress of Max and Maya's dog portrait painting in oil.

As you can see, I have mostly completed Max and will now start on Maya. As I get her closer to finish I will then add final touches of color and detail to make everything sing. I do tend to go to details early because I enjoy watching things come to life quickly. I always have to fight myself not to do that too quickly so as to focus on structure. However, sometimes it is great to eat dessert first!

Soon Soulful Studios will take it to the outdoors again to do some plein air paintings. There's a blue heron at a local pond that I'm dying to at least capture with the camera. I wonder if I can't paint fast enough to suggest him on the spot. Oooh, I think I see a challenge...

Say Goodbye to Winter

"The Last of Winter 3"
5" x 7"
Acrylic on Canvas

This weekend we push our clocks forward an hour. I can remember years ago when we had a major snow event in April. My gut says that won't be happening this year. That being said please don't email me angry letters if I'm wrong.

I look at these geese paintings and think how peaceful that day was but at the same time there is some dishonesty here. Yes, this was the scene before me and it was charming and serene. What I didn't show was what happened next. If I were to do another painting from this day, it would depict geese frantically flying away from a very excited little grey dog. Any guesses on the name of this dog?

Perhaps the lesson here is nothing is permanent. Take your pleasures while you can. You never know when some sweet little dog is going to chase away your bliss.

Stay tuned to Soulful Studios for updates on more pet portraits and spring paintings. Send me an email through the website for more information on these or other paintings. Feel free to leave a comment on the blog to let me know what you think.

A Little More Winter

"The Last of Winter 2"

5"x7"

Acrylic on Canvas

Winter is coming to a close. Even the cold days aren't as bad because the ground holds more warmth from the sun. Nature is waking up and getting busy.

I thought I would do a few more paintings about winter before it slips away for another year. Yes, I am ready for spring and the refreshing feeling that comes with it. This is just my final farewell to the snows of 2011.

If you are interested in this or any of my other paintings please go to the Soulful Studios contact page and send me an email.

Have a great weekend.

The Last of Winter

"The Last of Winter"

5"x7"

Acrylic on Canvas

Walking the dog after a little snowfall is always magical. My pup leaps through the snow, tugging on the leash and pulls me off my feet like a sled dog. This is something to see considering he is only 16 pounds and I'm no delicate flower. Last week I believe was winter's last major effort for the season.

Despite my dear canine companion's need to drag me along, I did take the time to sit quietly by the edge of the pond, to watch these two geese swim together peacefully. They seemed so pleased that the water was liquid again. They paddle along almost like a dance. I tried to match the ease of their being with the deftness of my brush. Ripples from their movement couldonly be captured with lightness of hand and heart.

I hope you enjoy their serenity. If you would like information on pricing and how to purchase this or any of my other paintings, feel free to email me. My email can be found on the contact page of my Soulful Studios website.

Doberman Dog Portrait - Max and Maya - Under Painting

Under painting for Pet Portrait in Oil

What is so fascinating about art is it can exercise the mind in many ways. Two processes of the mind are the doing mode and the being mode. I will discuss the development of this pet portrait of Max and Maya to illustrate my point. When I was first commissioned to do this piece I had many decisions to make. I was provided different photos and options to create the portrait. My mind busily made decisions and judgments on which photos to work from and sizes to pick. This is the doing mode where the mind actively darts from thought to thought analyzing and comparing everything to evaluate and decide. However, at times I would feel a sense of calm and stop thinking. My eyes would look at these dog faces and just feel them looking back at me and there and then a connection to my subject was born in the being mode. In the being mode I did not decide how to feel about these two but rather I was just aware of the feeling. It is in that frame of mind that my work begins to breathe on its own.

The beginnings, where I sketch and measure with my eyes, I am very much in the doing mode. It is critical to get proportions correct and planes well described. As the piece becomes structurally sound my mind relaxes. When I’m painting for some time and finally become aware that my playlist of songs has gone from Billie Holiday to Bing Crosby without grabbing my attention, I realize I was in being mode. In being mode, my natural instinct takes over and the natural creator in me begins to paint. Later in the doing mode, I will see corrections need to be made, much as I see in this under painting. However, without the being mode, my dear Max and Maya would never live on canvas. No, they would just be painted images representing two Dobermans named Max and Maya.

Painting much like life requires both actions of the brain. Sadly, our culture stresses the goal oriented, doing mode, far more than mindfulness of just being. When we are goal oriented we tend think out ever issue and go over and over a problem in a forced way to solve it. Being mindful allows the body and mind to be aware without judgment and naturally things sort themselves out. I was strongly reminded of this last night while trying to learn to dance. My judging mind kept trying so hard to learn and figure out the steps. The more I did that the worse the result, not to mention the plight of a few toes. Now and then when I relaxed and just absorbed the music, my feet took care of themselves. As soon as an instructor mentioned I was doing well, the magic stopped and my thinking was in charge of my feet again with an obvious bad result. One instructor even said, “Don’t think just dance”. Oh this is very true but much like being told not to think about a pink elephant, once one is told not to think, that is all one can do.

So what is the answer to all these mental gymnastics? Curiosity. Curiosity for life and just enjoying it unfolding trumps all. More on Max, Maya and the art of curiosity in future Soulful Studios posts.

Doberman Dog Portrait - Max and Maya

"Max and Maya"
18"x24"
Custom Pet Portrait
beginning sketch on canvas

Being that it is Valentine's Day I thought I would share the beginnings of Soulful Studios' recent pet portrait. This is to be an oil painting commissioned to show love for another and about love of two beautiful Dobermans named Max and Maya. The care and devotion attached to this piece, coupled with the sculptural beauty of the animals make this so enjoyable for me to create.

The success of my work often depends on a connection I have with the people that commission me as well as the connection I feel with the animal subject. In this case I am moved by both. These two dogs have amazing personalities that compliment each other. Max is regal and far more forthright in his interest to show himself than Maya is. Maya has a stoic nature and uses her thick build only when she has needs to be met. The dog parents take immense pleasure in the antics of these two and the entire group is full of love. I actually used the direction of the dogs' ears to suggest that they are also paying attention to their beloved owners. It is a good compositional tool as well as a way to include everyone in the image, even if it is only known to me (and you).

Our dogs show us love 365 days a year without fail. They do not let a bad day after breaking squeaky toy keep them from expressing their love. They do not wake up and say they feel to fat and ugly to share themselves with us. They always seize an opportunity to cuddle if the desire is there and don't let thoughts of being pushed away earlier in the day stop them. They never worry that other dogs might laugh at their displays of affection nor do they judge another for their efforts. Dogs don't use words; they use action to show their love. Dogs that are treated well just love.

I invite you to spend a day being open with your love like your dog does. Forget about your bad day, it will be there waiting if you want to come back to it. Just love. You might just get a good belly rub out of it.

Greyhound Dog Portrait - Angel

"Angel"
Dog Portrait Commission
5"x7"
graphite on archival paper


The more information you give this pet portrait artist the better. When I was first sent photos of Angel, this sweet greyhound, I felt unsure that the photos represented her well. Though she was lovely and gentle, she appeared camera shy. I insisted that the owner take another group of photographs. That group showed her even more coquettish but confirmed that is indeed her personality, ears down and all.

This is a loving gift commissioned by a daughter for her mother. Young women investing in art touches my soul like nothing else. It gives me hope that things made by hand are not lost on the current generation of young adults. Also, I'm reminded that love of one's dog is a truth we all can agree upon.

Often people ask me why I do pet portraits and focus on animals in my art. It isn't that I don't like people or can't paint them. That isn't the case. The real issue for me is when we have a pet in our minds and hearts, all words and judgments cease. We no longer are controlled by voices in our heads or the world. We just have an overwhelming feeling of love. For some people this sensation happens when they listen to music or walk in the woods. I know the truth of love when I look into an animal's eyes. Since one cannot really put the feelings of love accurately into words, creating pet portraits fills that need. That is the idea behind Soulful Studios. Only people that truly know the love of a pet, commission me therefore, I deal with all the best people. How lucky am I?

When are you going to commission your own portrait of love?

Feelings and Reality

"Bending Over Backwards"

5"x7"

Acrylic on Panel

Email to Purchase

I just returned from the market. Another storm approaches the area and everyone is talking about it. Some people complained and others made jokes. In either case, more winter weather is on the way and there is nothing we can do about it. If you don't like the cold or driving in snowy conditions the pain is coming but should you suffer?

It all depends on the story you tell yourself. So often we say we hate winter and want spring to arrive. If only the ice would melt we would be happy. That's the tale we tell ourselves. What if we were to spin it another way? Could you imagine everyone smiling and saying how they love to make soup on blustery days or not being able to spend time outside gives them time to focus on fixing up their home? Or better yet, after a season of running the kids around they are enjoying just watching old movies and wearing their favorite flannel pajamas.

I'm learning that what is is. If I attach a negative feeling to a situation that is the story I tell myself about it. It drags me down like an anchor and I have only myself to blame. However if I decide that fighting with reality is insanity and I create a positive emotion to connect to my experience, life becomes lighter and brighter.

To take it a step further, I can even take each feeling and question it against what I know to be provably true. Most feelings do not stand up well to fact. When I take that approach, life becomes curiosity and my world is full of possibilities.

The trick is to be able to do this when feelings are overwhelming. That takes planning. When feelings look like truth and you are ready to believe your own bad press, it is wise to breathe. Breathe deeply and call a friend who knows the real you, not you mired in emotion.

If all else fails there is always chocolate. Where did I put that brownie?

How Long Is Too Long

"Icy Edge"
Acrylic on Panel
5"x7"
Email to Purchase

My last blog post discussed fear, the difficult times we all face and how this artist deals with these feelings. This touched a lot you and I received many email responses. Many were like Ivana's, who left a reply, saying sometimes her art takes her out of the depths but other times it is just easier to keep falling. I relate to this very much.

I'm always fighting myself. Sometimes I feel I must push forward and not allow anything negative to stay around long. Other times I just let it happen and practically bathe in it. It is really hard to know which path to choose and how long is too long to be unproductive or down.

Personally I try just to learn something from those moments and focus on the lesson. That way, whether I push or fall, I come away richer for the experience. The times that frustrate me most are when I don't learn the lesson. Then the pain must be presented to me again in hopes that I get it this time. I believe that is how the universe works. There are key things we are all meant to learn and we will be faced with them over and over again until we get it right.

The greatest lesson of all is that pain is inevitable but suffering is optional. It's easier said than lived. I'll write more on that next time. I look forward to your comments.

A Soulful Touch of Winter

"Beginning Or End "
5"x7"
Acrylic On Panel
Email to purchase

It’s been a while. So much water has gone under this bridge since my last post. Fans of my work often comment that what a relief it must be to be able to use art to deal with my emotions. Most times it is. However, sometimes things can feel so overwhelming that my ability to connect to a feeling long enough to paint it stops dead in its tracks. The longer that goes on the worse it is for me and my creativity, not to mention healing.

We’ve all been there. Everyone shares a time when life is just too much. We do everything we can to mask the pain and just move on but it follows us like a stalker needing a fix. Sometimes all we can do is just let it get ugly and entertain our pain. Feeding it and letting it blossom to see what it is really all about can sometimes lift you out of the fog so you can move forward again. The old saying about it getting darkest before the dawn is true. Many times fear of clarity gets in the way and just as the pain is about to get its darkest we run only to have to face the same pain again.

I’ve learned the pain won’t kill me but fear will. Fear is our greatest enemy and most times it comes from within. Learning to investigate it, live in the discomfort and make decisions based on the one’s integrity rather than the fear is the greatest lesson of all. For me it has been the most challenging, painful, fascinating and empowering experience. This is the freedom for which our souls cry out. This is where peace can be found.

Airedale Dog Portrait - Max Has Arrived

"Max"
11x14
graphite on archival paper
private commission

Happy post Thanksgiving everyone! I figured I would start off the holiday season with the final installment of Max's pet portrait. Isn't he a charming and handsome fellow? I can just imagine the doggie manipulation that took place over the holiday to score some turkey treats! My own Mr. Brady really worked the crowd here at Soulful Studios, I can guess that Mr. Max was doing the same. Don't you find your meal more enjoyable when some little brown eyes look at every morsel with longing? Ok, maybe that's taking things too far but I just can't imagine a holiday without some little fury child doing his best begging act. Can you?

Airedale Dog Portrait - More of Max

graphit dog portrait progression photos

Almost there folks. Some pieces literally draw themselves. For my readers who are learning about art or are curious about the process, I'll explain.

This dog portrait had a lot in its favor from the start. The head was already at a three-quarter angle. Airedales have great wiry coats that lend to lots of detail and fun pencil strokes. Max's coloring has many different tones and values that allow me to easily model and render the image, making it not only interesting but three dimensional. His face has a natural smile that is charming and his eyes sparkle. Finally, his owners are positive people who appreciate the process and allow me to work freely. Put this all together and you have a very enjoyable commission to create.

Please come back soon to Soulful Studios to see the final installment of Max's pet portrait. Let me know what you think.

Airedale Dog Portrait - Max Is Mr. Handsome

beginning stages of Max's portrait

Every now and then I get a chance to do a commission of a dog that makes me smile the entire time I work. This is just one of those opportunities. Max is a well loved Airedale and I have the honor of doing his dog portrait in graphite. He is so cheerful looking and handsome in his photos. I'm told he even has the name "Mr. Handsome" at his vet's office. I cannot tell you what a pleasure it is to work on this piece.

Max's dog portrait is a loving anniversary gift. It never ceases to amaze me how important pets are in our lives. They hold such a special place in our hearts that reference to them is used as a romantic gesture. This just tickles me to no end.

Stay tuned and in a few days Soulful Studios will share Max's pet portrait update. Now go pet your furry family member! If you'd like to make a romantic gesture of your own contact me and let's make it happen.

Mixed Signals

"Socks, Sage and Reno"

24"x36"

oil on canvas

private commission

Walking down my street earlier in the week I noticed a few brave branches of forsythia blooming as well as some other non-seasonal treats. Fall is here but the weather plays games with the temperature making not only humans but nature confused on what to wear. I used to think that only mankind twisted things but after my stroll I decided nothing is immune to mixed signals.

Nothing is ever clear cut. Going with the flow is important but getting swept up in inconsistency can often lead to no good. Ask those little spring like flowers about it after the next few near freezing nights. They'll tell you they wished they waited to make sure the warmth was status quo and not happenstance.

The above dog portrait in oil has nothing to do with happenstance. The conversation between the dogs and the viewer is quite deliberate. Depending on your relationship or knowledge of their personalities the story will change. Oh, perhaps Soulful Studios just made a deceptive statement. Maybe the background story would change your experience? Mixed signals indeed.

I Wish I Were Me

Yup, that's me folks speaking about art last night at the Salem County Art League. Bob Reid was kind enough to make this montage of me. I appreciate that he picked photos without me showing more than one chin! Oh it was a real hootenanny alright. I'm not quite sure what I said but at one point my famous Zuni Indian fetish necklace lost a critter. That was a crowd pleaser for certain.

Seriously though, at times I felt like I was two people, one was speaking and the other was hovering listening to the presentation. Please don't send the men in white jackets. What I'm saying is that I heard what I was telling the group and for the most part it was a positive message. So many more things I wish I shared but my talk focused on what motivates an artist. I was told I had a lot of energy and was inspirational . Could that be? Often times alone in my studio I question the value of what I'm doing. There are days I am ready to set fire to my work and think a regular paycheck would be a more prudent move.

Then there are moments where I see a hint of brilliance or someone thanks me for teaching them a new technique or idea . I tell myself just for that it is all worth it. Being an artist requires a great deal of faith. You need to believe that no matter what, this is what you were meant to do. If you depend on praise or big bank accounts for affirmation you will starve in more ways than one. Doubt will cause more pain than empty pockets. Interestingly enough, if you believe, don't waste energy on the negative and put everything into your art, you are more likely to be outwardly rewarded. If you neglect the importance of the inner reward, nothing will save you.

These are wise words my friends.

I like that me.

I strive to be me.

Pet Portraits in Oil

Work in Progress
Dog Portrait
Oil on Canvas

Postcard for Gallery 50

Gallery 50's "Nature and the Landscape" show was a success. I won an award for best oil or acrylic and my good friend Alex Alampi won "Best of Show". As you can see we shared the postcard, so to share the night's awards was a plus. There were some very fine pieces at this show and it was an honor to receive any recognition.

Above is my current work in progress. Those of you who have visited my studio have seen this one develop and it still has a long way to go. This is a very poor photograph so the color is off and the image is cut but it gives you an idea of what I'm doing. I had certain things in mind for this piece and it hasn't gone according to plan. There is no area currently on the painting that is finished and the paint is thin and the strokes are tight. My desire is to loosen up on this as it has gone a bit to the slick side. Generally it is difficult to get loose once you tighten up but I still think I can do it. My plan is to not look at photo reference for a few sessions and go with my gut in terms of stroke and color. To try that now is a bold move but for the sake of the art it must be done.

In terms of doing my job as a pet portrait artist I am on target with this painting. However, when one looks at this piece purely from a fine arts standpoint the piece needs help. Many pet portrait artists are only concerned about how their work stands up to likeness and realism. This is never an issue for me and I feel blessed for that reason. What I challenge myself with all the time is to create commission work that stands alone as a piece of fine art. This portrait of dogs is not there yet but I'm no where near done.

Finishing this piece is paramount to my health. I believe this may be one of the last oils I do. Since I've been working on this piece I've been in a great deal of pain and have been quite ill. My body no longer tolerates the toxins from oils. I've been struggling with this issue for years and believe the problem is more than I can handle now. I'm trying not to be sad or scared about the loss of my precious oils but rather excited about focusing on the possibilities with acrylics and other mediums.

My smaller works are always acrylics for this reason but I've never done pet portraits or larger pieces using them. Recently texture and a more painterly look interest me. I look to the daily painter groups for inspiration. Ideas swirl in my head about changes and new approaches. My next post will share some of those ideas with you so do come back soon to Soulful Studios.